(The Jacuzzi J-400 hot tub. Babes, golf clubs, and bad khaki pants not included.)

Our New Year’s resolution? We don’t feel that making a better life in 2008 involves making any sacrifices- we believe there is something altogether different that will give us a sense of completeness, a true happiness in 2008 and beyond. We want a hot tub, dammit… a hot tub. Do you share in our interest, fellow GearCraver? Well buying a hot tub isn’t an impulse buy, its not something you just toss in your shopping cart at Walmart (we tried it– didn’t work). Since we figured this out the hard way, we put together a handy guide to help you navigate the world of hot tubs for minimum headaches– and maximum hot tub action. Keep reading for the GearCrave guide to hot tub happiness.

Buying a hot tub isn’t quite as simple as whipping out your credit card, but many times the biggest obstacle to owning one is misinformation. You should approach a dealer with as much of the equation already sorted out in your head as possible, so you’ll need to unlearn some common misconceptions and do a bit of forward thinking. When it comes to clearing up misconceptions, did you know you can own a hot tub without paying out the nose for special plumbing? It’s true:

• Above-ground or “portable” hot tubs can be filled with any available water source.
• Hot tubs can be connected to your home plumbing system using PVC pipe.
• In-ground hot tubs do require special plumbing since the water pipe will run underground, through concrete, or with other special modifications.
• If this is your first purchase, it’s strongly recommended you go with an above-ground solution, as they are far more inexpensive and easy to install, maintain, even relocate.
• Connecting the tub to your plumbing system is only part of the equation; you’ll also need to be able to service your plumbing in case of a leaking or blocked pipe. Above-ground installation makes this type of maintenance much easier.

You can hook up a hot tub or jacuzzi to your existing plumbing system because the hot tub is equipped with a pump that does the work of forcing the water through the jet nozzles, which creates the churning water action hot tubs are famous for. And that brings us some other considerations;

• Decide how many people you want to fit into your hot tub.
• Decide how many water jets you want in your hot tub if you have the option.

Hot tubs come in a variety of configurations including those made for only one or two people, plus much larger (and more expensive) versions. Some dealers let you customize your hot tub by specifying a number of water jets based on the size of the tub or the number of people it can accommodate. Don’t skimp on the number of jets if you have a choice! Go for at least the middle-of the-road number and don’t buy the bare minimum. If your dealer only offers a fixed number of jets based on hot tub size, your thinking has already been done for you, but be sure to shop around to see what other options exist before deciding.

Your hot tub location will depend on three very important factors:

• You’ll need an area with enough clearance to handle the size of the tub.
• The floor should be rated to handle the weight of the hot tub when it is filled and occupied.
• Your power supply may require modification by a qualified electrician depending on how far your hot tub is from a power outlet and voltage requirements.

When you buy your hot tub, one expense people often forget is water cleaning and purification. There are three basic issues to contend with here:

• Lime build-up, which requires a descaler chemical.
• Maintaining the proper pH balance in your hot tub water, which requires chemical treatment to keep water at around 7.2 pH.
• Preventing bacteria, which requires a chemical called Bromine.

Your hot tub has clean water issues just like a swimming pool does. Do not neglect this part of your hot tub budget, or you’ll wind up with rashes and skin problems as a result. Icky, right? Fortunately many spa vendors sell these chemicals together in a single kit for maximum convenience.

If you are a determined-but-inexperienced DIYer, you should know reputable hot tub and spa dealers strongly encourage their customers to consult with a good plumber before making alterations to your plumbing system. If you know what you’re doing, you may not need the expert advice, but for those who just purchased a tool box, the advice is quite important. Do you understand the basics that every good plumber knows? Take our Spa Plumbing 101 test to see if you’re clued-in or clue-deficient:

1. True or False: I can hook up my hot tub or jacuzzi to my home plumbing system using soft PVC pipe as long as the fittings match and connect properly.
2. True of False: A rigid PVC pipe allows bacteria to collect in the pipe and should not be used.

The answer to both questions is “false”. Plumbers know bacteria can collect in a sagging soft PVC pipe if the water doesn’t drain properly. Rigid pipe allows all water to drain out completely and keeps your plumbing system from turning into an orgy for bacteria. These are basic issues, your plumber can help you with a proper installation including advice about safety. Did you know all hot tubs should be equipped with a Ground Fault Interrupter Circuit? This safety featrure deactivates the tub’s electrical system to prevent an accidental electrocution. Your hot tub should also have a cutoff switch which shuts down the water pump to prevent drowning should someone’s hair or a body part become trapped in the pump.

Buying a hot tub is much easier when you have these considerations in mind. If you decide in advance what size you want, know you’ll need to buy a chemical kit, and insure you have the proper safety equipment, the only thing left to do is get some advice on installation or schedule a pro to do it for you. Then you can turn on the water, activate the pump, and let the hot tub party commence! Bow chicka wow.