The marketing hype for this 80,000 volt man-zapper says that a three-second jolt from this monster will drop an attacker and give “mental disorientation”. If the definition of disorientation includes using your pants as a portable toilet, we suppose that statement would be accurate. EIGHTY THOUSAND VOLTS! Remember, when the blackout hits, just don’t hit the wrong button while you’re fumbling around in the dark for this thing.

Buy for $39.95