You might not get pulled over today, or tomorrow, but the law of averages says you’re going to tangle with Johnny Cop and his radar gun sooner or later. Is your lead foot a liability? Do you need an edge when it comes to the rules of the road? GearCrave won’t tell you it’s possible to ride like the Dukes of Hazzard and get away with it forever, but with a few seconds of smart thinking you might just get let off with a warning instead of a hefty fine and a court appearance. The trick is to learn how to think like a cop. Find out how after the jump.

Most people panic when they see those flashing lights. And why shouldn’t they? You don’t know what’s going to happen–the first couple of times you’ve been busted. But after a few fines, you start to recognize a few things about the way a cop’s mind works. Respect their point of view–it can teach you how to avoid showing up for traffic court:

• Did you just blast by a squad car? Ignore that instinct to slam on the brakes. Don’t do it! The surest way for a cop with no radar gun to tell him you were speeding is to see those brake lights suddenly go on and see the front end of your car take a nose dive because you slammed on the brakes. When this happens, it translates into “you knew you were speeding and now you’re trying not to get busted.” Too late! Take your foot off the gas instead and gradually slow down without the brake. The sleepy cop with his eyes on a donut instead of the speed readings may just let you go.
• If you’re speeding neck-in-neck with another speeding car in the next lane, don’t automatically pull over for the traffic cop when you see those flashing lights. They could be pulling over the other guy. The cop may just decide to see who pulls over first and bust them.
• The schmuck who knows they are busted and pulls right over has practically admitted guilt already, which is exactly what the cop wants to happen.
• Are you all alone on your part of the road? The same logic from #2 can still work–if you see flashing lights behind you, don’t automatically pull over. Act like you think he’s pulling over someone else and do what everybody else does when they see the lights, get out of the guy’s way and slow down–wait and see if he wants YOU, or is trying to get around you. Pulling over automatically means you know you’re guilty.

The bottom line: do NOT evade a traffic stop (unless you like handcuffs), but use your behavior to establish enough doubt in the cop’s mind so that when he asks you if you knew how fast you were going, your “No” will be a lot more credible.

If you do get pulled over, there’s plenty to keep in mind to make your close encounter of the cop kind a less painful experience. The first step is to understand how you look to the cop:

• Never admit to knowing you broke the law. Nothing pisses off a cop more than people who knew they were breaking the law and did it anyway.
• Be polite–but don’t kiss the cop’s ass. Any hint you are sucking up could hurt your chances of getting off with a warning. Any sarcasm will double your chances of a bad ticket or worse. Never act like your business is more important than cop business, that kind of snobbery that gets you a nice, fat fine. “This civilian thinks he’s got bigger things to worry about than ME?”
• Aside from refusing to admit you knowingly broke the law, be honest in every other respect–or at least have an honest-sounding reason why you just had to break the law. Cops are trained to spot your bullshit, and they’ve already heard all the excuses five times today. And beware any excuse that could cause a helpful cop to offer you a police escort. Once they offer, it’s either take them up on it, or get busted.
• Have your license ready and make sure you have any “helpful” items clearly visible: a military ID or state/county/hospital/fire fighter ID. Don’t refer to it or try to use it…just let it be visible. Subtlety works. Don’t dive into for the glove box to get your insurance. Wait for the cop to tell you to get it. Cops get nervous when people reach for the place where guns are often hidden, and a freaked-out cop is a pissed off cop. Don’t make him nervous for any reason and you have a better chance of getting off with a warning.
• You may have a dead hooker in the trunk and a Hefty bag of blow under the seat, but you don’t have to tip the guy off by acting like you do. Act guilty and you are guilty, at least for the purposes of the traffic stop.

Finally, be nervous. Be scared, like you’ve never been pulled over before. Don’t try to out-macho the cop by pretending it’s no big deal…be appropriately humbled and you could get off with a warning. After all this, if you STILL get a ticket, delay the court date as much as possible and make it inconvenient for the cop to show. No cop in court equals your case being thrown out. You’re off the hook!